趣味英語：幽默故事6則

The Old Cat

An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old. One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.

Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years, and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old, but remember what good work the old did when they were young."

【譯文】

老貓

一位老婦有只貓，這只貓很老，它跑不快了，也咬不了東西，因?yàn)樗昙o(jì)太大了。一天，老貓發(fā)現(xiàn)一只老鼠，它跳過去抓這只老鼠，然而，它咬不住這只老鼠。因此，老鼠從它的嘴邊溜掉了，因?yàn)槔县堃Р涣怂?/p>

于是，老婦很生氣，因?yàn)槔县垱]有把老鼠咬死。她開始打這只貓，貓說：“不要打你的老仆人，我已經(jīng)為你服務(wù)了很多年，而且還愿意為你效勞，但是，我實(shí)在太老了，對年紀(jì)大的不要這么無情，要記住老年人在年青時(shí)所做過的有益的事情。”

A man was going to the house of some rich person. As he went along the road, he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road. He said, "I do not want to eat those apples; for the rich man will give me much food; he will give me very nice food to eat." Then he took the apples and threw them away into the dust.

He went on and came to a river. The river had become very big; so he could not go over it. He waited for some time; then he said, "I cannot go to the rich man's house today, for I cannot get over the river."

He began to go home. He had eaten no food that day. He began to want food. He came to the apples, and he was glad to take them out of the dust and eat them.

Do not throw good things away; you may be glad to have them at some other time.

【譯文】

一個(gè)人正朝著一個(gè)富人的房子走去，當(dāng)他沿著路走時(shí)，在路的一邊他發(fā)現(xiàn)一箱好蘋果，他說：“我不打算吃那些蘋果，因?yàn)楦蝗藭o我更多的食物，他會給我很好吃的東西。”然后他拿起蘋果，一把扔到土里去。

他繼續(xù)走，來到河邊，河漲水了，因此，他到不了河對岸，他等了一會兒，然后他說：“今天我去不了富人家了，因?yàn)槲也荒芏蛇^河。”

他開始回家，那天他沒有吃東西。他就開始去找吃的，他找到蘋果，很高興地把它們從塵土中翻出來吃了。

不要把好東西扔掉，換個(gè)時(shí)候你會覺得它們大有用處。

The City Mouse and the Country Mouse

Once there were two mice. They were friends. One mouse lived in the country; the other mouse lived in the city. After many years the Country mouse saw the City mouse; he said, "Do come and see me at my house in the country." So the City mouse went. The City mouse said, "This food is not good, and your house is not good. Why do you live in a hole in the field? You should come and live in the city. You would live in a nice house made of stone. You would have nice food to eat. You must come and see me at my house in the city."

The Country mouse went to the house of the City mouse. It was a very good house. Nice food was set ready for them to eat. But just as they began to eat they heard a great noise. The City mouse cried, " Run! Run! The cat is coming!" They ran away quickly and hid.

After some time they came out. When they came out, the Country mouse said, "I do not like living in the city. I like living in my hole in the field. For it is nicer to be poor and happy, than to be rich and afraid."

【譯文】

城里老鼠和鄉(xiāng)下老鼠

從前，有兩只老鼠，它們是好朋友。一只老鼠居住在鄉(xiāng)村，另一只住在城里。很多年以后，鄉(xiāng)下老鼠碰到城里老鼠，它說：“你一定要來我鄉(xiāng)下的家看看。”于是，城里老鼠就去了。鄉(xiāng)下老鼠領(lǐng)著它到了一塊田地上它自己的家里。它把所有最精美食物都找出來給城里老鼠。城里老鼠說：“這東西不好吃，你的家也不好，你為什么住在田野的地洞里呢?你應(yīng)該搬到城里去住，你能住上用石頭造的漂亮房子，還會吃上美味佳肴，你應(yīng)該到我城里的家看看。”

鄉(xiāng)下老鼠就到城里老鼠的家去。房子十分漂亮，好吃的東西也為他們擺好了?？墒钦?dāng)他們要開始吃的時(shí)候，聽見很大的一陣響聲，城里的老鼠叫喊起來：“快跑!快跑!貓來了!”他們飛快地跑開躲藏起來。

過了一會兒，他們出來了。當(dāng)他們出來時(shí)，鄉(xiāng)下老鼠說：“我不喜歡住在城里，我喜歡住在田野我的洞里。因?yàn)檫@樣雖然貧窮但是快樂自在，比起雖然富有卻要過著提心吊膽的生活來說，要好些。”

Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?

Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".

老師:為什么你每天早晨都遲到?

湯姆:每當(dāng)我經(jīng)過學(xué)校的拐角處,就看見一個(gè)牌子上寫著"學(xué)校----慢行".

A Good Boy

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

"She is the one who sells the candy."

好孩子

小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。

“昨天給你的錢干什么了?”

“我給了一個(gè)可憐的老太婆，”他回答說。 “你真是個(gè)好孩子，”媽媽驕傲地說。“再給你兩分錢。可你為什么對那位老太太那么感興趣呢?”

“她是個(gè)賣糖果的。”

Drunk

One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."

"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"

醉酒

一天，父親與小兒子一道回家。這個(gè)孩子正處于那種對什么事都很感興趣的年齡，老是有提不完的問題。他向父親發(fā)問道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔，孩子，”父親回答說，“你瞧那兒站著兩個(gè)警察。如果我把他們看成了四個(gè)，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子說，“那兒只有一個(gè)警察呀!”